4.26.2012

Interesting post about thinking beyond "smart growth." Smart growth is a start. But it's not enough. "I’ve now come to the conclusion that smart growth is critical to a sustainable future, but it can only get us part way there. The truth is that much of what can make people habitat great cannot be quantified or put into identifiable categories. The process of creating a better, more sustainable world – anchored by better, more sustainable places - is as much art as science.Our communities of the future must not only reduce carbon emissions, save land, and encourage use of transit, walking and bicycling. They must also contain beauty, warmth, places of solitude and reflection. They must be significantly more dense than sprawl, but also sometimes forego additional increments of density in order to maintain light, limit noise, provide privacy, and respect a human scale. They must be conducive to engaging the intellect and the spirit."

Image: source.

Another new addition to the podcast line up (I need a lot now that I'm back to bike commuting and centuries - it's possibly the best part of riding. The only issue is having the self restraint to save up some good 'casts for the long rides....): Opinonated: The Feminist You Were Warned About.

So, I've been of two minds for a while about whether or not I wanted to train for another marathon (I did my first, and only, on May 1, 2011). I loved the experience of becoming a distance runner, and race day was one of the best days of my life. But it was a huge time commitment and definitely hard on my body. Anyways, when I saw that there was a Nike Women's Marathon in SF in October, I decided to enter the drawing and let fate decide. Well, apparently fate thinks I have another marathon in me! I found out today that I got in. I have lots to say about how I'll train differently this time around, my fears and hopes, etc so...stay tuned!

4.22.2012

Recent addition to the podcast lineup: The /Filmcast. Sometimes I think I enjoy listening to people talk about movies and tv more than I even enjoy watching movies and tv. Is there a word for this? Is this a thing?

So proud of my CrossFit box, Rogue Valley CrossFit, which was voted favorite small/medium health club in the region. And of the owner, and my coach, Jake, who was voted best trainer! I can't think of a more deserving community - they work hard to create a supportive, encouraging, and challenging environment, it's really one of a kind.

It's time to stop putting mentally ill prisoners in solitary confinement! Why Are Prisoners Committing Suicide in Pennsylvania?

Image: source.

Dear 40 year old me (from the IL Safe Schools Alliance). Yep, tears for sure. Amazing youth.

Fashion It So does it again.

I enjoyed this short first-person essay about being an out, trans athlete.

4.18.2012

Wow. 101 Spectacular Nonfiction Stories: "Conor Friedersdorf's annual collection of the very best that journalism has to offer."

Smithsonian: Where Agatha Christie Dreamed Up Murder: "The birthplace of Poirot and Marple welcomes visitors looking for clues to the best-selling novelist of all time."

Image: source.

Loved this article from the great blog Fit & Feminist (best tag line ever: "Because it takes strong women to smash the patriarchy.") , I am envious of women who “bulk up” easily. I admit that I still have moments of adjustment to no longer working towards being as small, as invisible as possible, and instead aim to be fit and strong, even if that means my thighs are, gasp, bigger. And from xoJane (I'm not a huge fan, generally...): Competitive Powerlifter Secrets: What The Diet Industry Doesn't Want You To Know Abou Weights. I’m wary (to put it lightly) of anything that’s just focused on weight loss (as opposed to general health, flexibility, strength, etc) but I appreciate popping that myth of “scary big” female body builders, etc.

Chrissie Wellington: I have got nothing to prove to anyone anymore. "Triathlete charts her troubled journey from the despair of eating disorders to becoming the unbeaten ironman world record holder." Chrissie is a hero of mine, not only hard working and incredibly gifted, but always has a smile on her face. And now she bravely comes out as an eating disorder survivor - thank you, Chrissie! "Sport has given me a different perception and respect for my body. I cannot judge its success by whether I can fit into a pair of skinny jeans. I look at other women and, yes, they're beautiful with stereotypically wonderful figures but I can think, 'Yeah, but you haven't won what I've won.' I might not be perfect but I can love my body now."

4.17.2012

Horrible. Why I buy only local, organic, cage- and hormone- free eggs: "Is an Egg for Breakfast Worth This?"

Some of the other great movies I saw at the aiff: Detropia, Waiting Room, Austin Unbound, Paraiso, Vera Klement.

From Mother Jones: Prozac: What's Race Got to Do With It?

Image: source.

The Magnetic Fields, Live In Concert: SXSW 2012 and John K. Samson (of The Weakerthans) On World Cafe

9-Year-Old’s Homemade Arcade is Rad

“There are some good things to be said about walking . . . Walking takes longer, for example, than any other known form of locomotion except crawling. Thus it stretches time and prolongs life. Life is already too short to waste on speed. I have a friend who's always in a hurry; he never gets anywhere. Walking makes the world much bigger and thus more interesting. You have time to observe the details. The utopian technologists foresee a future for us in which distance is annihilated . . . To be everywhere at once is to be nowhere forever, if you ask me.” - Edward Abbey

4.12.2012



And tonight, Highest Pass.


The second doc I'll be watching today at the aiff, Invisible War.


The ashland independent film fest [aiff] starts today! Battle For Brooklyn is the first film I'm seeing.

4.11.2012

"If we appear to seek the unattainable . . . we do so to avoid the unimaginable."

An Invitation to Create by Bill Ayers

Really interesting article about one man's experience with schizophrenia, and the way it is treated & understood, "Finding Purpose After Living With Delusion."

Image: from fuckyeahlisasimpson, of course.
An interview with Ashley Stinson about her images from Women’s Western Kentucky Correctional Facility in Fredonia, Kentucky.

"Good Fitspo Is Hard To Find" - SO true! I've unsubscribed to so many blogs/tumblrs/pins because of thinspo masquerading as fitspo (or just really boring shots of someone's every meal). (And yay for a CrossFit Babes shout out!) Here's my largely CrossFit themed "fitspo" (blech) board, if anyone's interested.

4.10.2012

4.06.2012

An interview with one female bus driver in Cuidad Juarez (one of the most dangerous cities in the world, and also where all Mexican citizens trying to emigrate to the United States must go to interview, sometimes having to stay for as long as a few years).

image: beautiful wind map

I won't lie - seeing these photos of a thin, beautiful young woman I thought, "What could she have to tell me about learning to love your body, to be healthy?" I was, of course, lame and wrong. Check out this great post (and lots more on her blog) about body image, the quest for perfection and control, and finding balance, peace, and acceptance.

Finally listened to the Fresh Air interview with Rachel Maddow. Really wonderful on multiple fronts, and I, along with many other people, appreciate her willingness to acknowledger her own struggle with depression. "Depression for me is you can’t distract your way out of it, and I think people can understand the difference, if you’ve never been depressed, you can still understand the difference between sadness and depression. It’s like the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. And the opposite of happiness isn’t necessarily sadness, it’s disconnection."

A short film from the National Religious Campaign Against Torture, Solitary Confinement: Torture In Your Backyard. "Torture. It’s not just something that happened at Abu Ghraib or in secret prison sites tucked away in distant countries. It’s happening now. It’s happening in prisons on U.S. soil. Prolonged solitary confinement is torture in your backyard."


“For a long time now, the legalization of our community has hinged on wrapping the flag of American nationalism around us and showing mainstream America that we are just like them, and in some cases, much better than them. “Dreamers” have been long portrayed as the model-minority of the undesirable undocumented population, as the lowest hanging fruits. Only recently have we started to agitate, celebrate our differences, and proudly state that our communities are diverse, our parents are not criminals, that most of us are not Valedictorians and star athletes, that some of us have had run-ins with the law, and that some of us think of home as dispersed among many hearts rather than being a geographical location in the USA. After all, we should not need to look and act the same in order to enjoy the same rights.” - Living the Dream Without the DREAM Act

4.04.2012

Check out this trailer for an amazing (looking) documentary about Hudson Link for Higher Education in Prison - a college program operating inside Sing Sing Maximum Security Correctional Facility. This is an issue close to my heart, and the type of program I believe in (my alma mater is home to the incredible Bard Prison Initiative).
Image: source.

A great post by Amy, at Just A Titch, about finding faith in yourself (and being proud of what you've worked for - loved that moment at the Eiffel Tower, Amy!)

R.I.P. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., killed 44 years ago today. (This short TAL segment gets me every time. Kids, man.)

I really liked this post, and I'm not even into Mad Men (spoiler alert if you're not up on MM or Dowton Abbey): Betty Draper Francis Needs Your… Ice Cream? A Few Notes on the Evil TV Ex-Wife: "These stories don’t exist in a void. They actually mimic — and reinforce — the stories we tell ourselves about male accountability in the real world. Men have more of an assumed right to recover from and forget their mistakes; this is true for things like abuse and unintended pregnancy, obviously, but it’s also true for the basic, petty moral failings of day-to-day life. I suspect that for every Psycho Ex-Girlfriend story, there’s a woman who’s been screwed over. (And behind every bizarre, nonsensically villainous ex-wife on an upscale soap opera, there’s a shitty straight dude working out his feelings about his ex. But I digress!) And she gets called names if she seems angry about that; she may never even express that anger clearly, because she feels too guilty about having it in the first place."

3.30.2012

Honduras: Human Rights Situation Deteriorates under U.S. Militarization, written by two wonderful friends with decades of involvement with and connection to Central America.

Awesome! Support cultural exchange, bring Shakespeare Iraq to the Oregon Shakespeare Festival (in my hometown of Ashland, OR)! Kickstarter: Shakespeare Iraq by Peter Friedrich

Will Self on why walking is political: "Year on year, the number of journeys taken on foot declines...The contemporary flâneur is by nature and inclination a democratising force who seeks equality of access, freedom of movement and the dissolution of corporate and state control."

Horrifying. House GOP: Rape Prevention Measures an Unreasonable Luxury (Also: really frustrating that a lot of this language and discussion imply that women are the only victims of rape).

"Worst case scenario, and also a very likely one: the universe decides you don’t find a forever partner. You date around. You focus on your career. You have a child on your own. You adopt one. You do shit you want to do, for yourself, and you don’t spend time forcing things, forcing people, forcing issues. Maybe for some people having a bad or mediocre relationship is more important than being alone. And that’s fine. But if that’s not your first priority, I think quitting dicking around with bullshit sounds like the best option." source.

Educate yourself: 9 Facts about the Sexual and Reproductive Health Needs of Transgender Individuals

“We [poets] may feel bitterly how little our poems can do in the face of seemingly out-of-control technological power and seemingly limitless corporate greed, yet it has always been true that poetry can break isolation, show us to ourselves when we are outlawed or made invisible, remind us of beauty where no beauty seems possible, remind us of kinship where all is represented as separation.” - Adrienne Rich

3.28.2012

YES. Tiger Beatdown: When anger is all I have and why anger is my feminist stand.

RIP Adrienne Rich. "I came to explore the wreck. / The words are purposes. / The words are maps." Her obituary in the L.A. Times.

From New America Media: Transgender Immigrant Detainees Cut Off From Legal Help

Portland couple blogs quest to pay down more than $69,000 in student debt.

Interesting and well-said: Barefaced and Beside the Point: Appearance Anxiety in Eating Disorders

I Will Always Love You” (Live) – Chris Cornell

Image: source.

"Denying grief its power squelches your vitality. You can dream and laugh and march on, but until you swallow the bitter tea that Grief has brewed, things won’t be as vibrant or grounded as they could be. And that’s half dead. Recognize where you are numb. Notice the memories that ouch the most. This is the beginning of response-ability." source.
Final Notions
by Adrienne Rich

It will not be simple, it will not take long
It will take little time, it will take all your thought
It will take all your heart, it will take all your breath
It will be short, it will not be simple

It will touch through your ribs, it will take all your heart
It will not take long, it will occupy all your thought
As a city is occupied, as a bed is occupied
It will take your flesh, it will not be simple

You are coming into us who cannot withstand you
You are coming into us who never wanted to withstand you
You are taking parts of us into places never planned
You are going far away with pieces of our lives

It will be short, it will take all your breath
It will not be simple, it will become your will
Amy Ray stopped by my local public radio station! Love love love "I Didn't."

What Everyone Needs To Know About The Smear Campaign Against Trayvon Martin (1995-2012)

Image: Happy Birthday week to Cesar Chavez!

Wow. Anti-Gay Marriage Group Recommends Creating Tension Between Gays and Blacks: "An internal memo from one of the country’s leading anti-gay marriage organizations [Nat'l Organization for Marriage] outlines a plan to defeat same-sex marriage and create division among Democrats by creating tension between gays and blacks over the issue....'The strategic goal of the project is to drive a wedge between gays and blacks — two key Democratic constituencies,' reads a portion of the memo, describing an initiative called the 'Not a Civil Right Project.'"

"It is possible to become discouraged about the injustice we see everywhere. But God did not promise us that the world would be humane and just. He gives us the gift of life and allows us to choose the way we will use our limited time on earth. It is an awesome opportunity." - Cesar Chavez

3.26.2012

New addition to the podcast rotation: Extra Hot Great. It's like Pop Culture Happy Hour, but maybe slightly less NPR-y and more Canadian? Can't wait till bike commuting starts up again (possibly as soon as next week!) and I get a solid 2 hours a day to listen to all these great shows.

An awesome line up of "small cool" spaces.

Loved this list of gender bending cover songs.
An out, queer CrossFitter made it to the Regionals - I'm loving this! Get it, girl! I'm proud of you already.

Listening to: Eddie Vedder's "Ukulele Songs." I admit that I was hesitant because ukulele makes me think twee annoyingness, but it's a great album (and a good at work listen, not always easy to find).






Feeling pretty discouraged and angry about the world (I guess it goes in phases/waves, because who can stand to be horrified and saddened every day?) Anyways, I was a HUGE Ani fan in my teenaged years, but don't listen to her much anymore. However, these three songs have felt really powerful and necessary recently. If anyone has suggestions for songs they listen to when they need help continuing to fight the good fight, or when they need to hear someone eloquently say what they are feeling about how f-ed this world seems, I'd love suggestions...

3.20.2012

A powerful first person account: 'We Have No Choice': One Woman's Ordeal with Texas' New Sonogram Law: "The painful decision to terminate a pregnancy is now—thanks to Texas' harsh new law—just the beginning of the torment."

More on the absoluately devastating murder of Trayvon Martin. White People, You Will Never Look Suspicious Like Trayvon Martin and from Mother Jones, The Trayvon Martin Killing, Explained: "How did a kid armed with Skittles and an iced tea get gunned down by an overeager neighborhood watch captain? And why didn't police detain shooter George Zimmerman?" and What Everyone Should Know About Trayvon Martin (1995-2012).

Image: source.

It's been hard to think about other things, less depressing things. But here are a few from the vaults, in case you need a breather: (1) Tiny Watercolor Paintings of Nostalgic Clothing; (2) StoryCorps 240: Women of a Certain Age; (3) beautiful: Bicycle Portraits: "Stan Engelbrecht & Nic Grobler are publishing the best 162 portraits and stories of the over 500 portraits of cyclists they’ve photographed during their 2 year journey around South Africa"; and, (4) adorable: Mini PiƱatas DIY.

3.17.2012

The Whole30

Today marks the 30th day of my Whole30!

What is Whole30 (and the Whole9)? The program's creators describe it this way: "Whole9’s original program designed to change your life in 30 days. Think of it as a short-term nutritional reset, designed to help you restore a healthy metabolism, heal your digestive tract, calm systemic inflammation and put an end to unhealthy cravings, habits, and relationships with food." It's a free program (although there is a good "Success Guide") you can purchase on their site, which has a lot of helpful info.

Why I Did It

I chose to do it for a few reasons. One, while I was in Nicaragua a lot of my eating habits were disrupted - and that was a good thing! I may not have eaten super well there, but it at least broke my habits. However, when I returned I started to fall right back into them - lots of sugar, no cooking for myself, calorie counting, etc, and I didn't feel good about that. Also, a number of people at CrossFit have done the Whole30 (many of them more than once), and had positive experiences. Finally, ever since attending my first CrossFit class in November, I've totally fallen in love with the sport. I have so many goals I want to reach - consecutive toe to bars, one unassisted pull up, dead-lifting over 200#, getting my double unders down, and much more! - and I hoped that Whole30 might help me become more of the lean, mean, CrossFit machine I dream of becoming.

Some Thoughts On My Experience With Whole30:

* For me, I think the best part about Whole30 has been the change in my morning routine. I've always loved breakfast foods (in college I used to eat 6-9 donuts a day - true story), and I've always had carb-y sweet things in the morning. In fact, on day 3 or 4 of Whole30 I actually had a moment where I woke up and thought, "Why bother getting out of bed, I don't get to have donuts/scones etc" - yikes, hello sugar addiction! While on Whole30 I made eggs every morning for breakfast, usually scrambled with spinach and chorizo. On the few days I haven't been able to do this, I really miss the protein. So this is something I know I will keep doing, saying to myself, maybe you'll have a scone later, but you cannot start the day with inadequate protein and a sugar rush.

* For someone like me (like a lot of us) who will always be in recovery from a life time of disordered eating, Whole30 was a great way to help me break my addiction to counting calories, and the fear a lot of us have of eating fat.

* It wasn't as brutal as it seems. I had to cook and plan a little more, and it can definitely make socializing tough, but for the most part it wasn't as hard as I worried it would be. Well, until......

* One thing I didn't see mentioned but would tell any woman thinking of doing it, is be aware of where you are in your cycle. You do not want to try to battle with PMS cravings and emotions at the same time as you start the Whole30. I didn't have as many sweet cravings as I thought I would, but when PMS arrived in Week 3 I was a real brat. I got cranky and wanted to just roll around in a vat of donuts and eat them all until I died a sweet sweet maple frosted death. So, you know, maybe start the Whole30 right after your period or something.

* Other physical benefits. I was really "regular" if you know what I mean. Also, my skin got better, and zits cleared up.

* Not riding that damn sugar roller coaster was great - I realized that when I eat sugar I get hot all over and flush, how quickly I would crave more, etc. And, of course, realized that most of the time I craved sugar it was because I was bored, sad, stressed, or something else unrelated to actually enjoying the food I was eating.

* One hard part: as an ex-vegetarian (and ex-vegan) who still struggles with my love of meat, sometimes it was hard to eat so much meat. The Whole30 people really stress eating hormone free, grass fed meat, which is awesome, and I tried to buy mine local as well. But having meat twice a day every day (at minimum) was sometimes hard for me to get used to, and I think it will continue to feel that way. (They've recently come out with more resources for vegetarians who want to try Whole30, but I think that would be very very difficult.)

* I like that I became much more aware of food labels. Previously, I had just looked at them to check out calories (truth), but when I started looking to see if they included any of the dozens of forms of sugar, I started to quickly put anything down with more than a half dozen ingredients. This was cool. I would pick something up and think, I don't even know what half of this stuff is - I'm not putting this in my body! I liked that.

* Finally, although the Whole30 crew instructs you not to weigh yourself during Whole30 and warns against our dependence on the scale generally, for many people weight loss is a motivating factor. I won't lie - it was attractive to me as well. Some people have incredible weight loss, like 20 pounds or more in a month, and people have such incredible testimonies (the weight fell off, everything in my life improved!) that it's easy to get your hopes up that the Whole30 will basically fix everything in your life. Unsurprisingly, that wasn't my experience. Weight loss wise, I lost a few pounds in the first week and then just maintained there. I definitely felt less bloated and more firm within the first week, which was great, but I didn't have huge weight loss and I think that's for a few reasons:

(1) I did as they say, and didn't monitor calories at ALL, which I think is good, and the ONLY way to really break your sugar addiction (which I did - yay!), but I think that some people who lose a lot of weight "break the rules" and limit their food intake/calorie count.

(2) I ate a ton of nuts and dried fruit (they recommend limiting your fruit intake, which I finally did the last week, but otherwise I was like, forget it, it's fruit and I'm already monitoring so much.

(3) I was working on building back all the muscle I lost in Nicaragua, so in reality I probably lost more than a few pounds of fat, but I added muscle (which is what I wanted, but it doesn't translate to scale #s).

They recommend doing body measurements before you start and I really wish I had done that, because I think that progress would be more noteworthy than the scale. Also, lifting weights and changing my mindset via CrossFit has definitely given me a more "f the scale" attitude - I've been thinner in the past, but fatter, if that makes sense, and now I'm relatively heavier but leaner, etc.

Support/Guides/Recipes:

Of course, the Whole30 site has a TON of good info (although it took me a while to find my way around, and, to be honest, I get sort of bored reading all the science stuff, or hearing people talk about how cave men ate, etc).

These aren't Whole30 specific sites, but a lot of them have done the Whole30 or are paleo (which is close to Whole30 but less strict. And people get really into "paleo treats" (like paleo "donuts" etc) that you are supposed to avoid during Whole30): The Clothes Make The Girl, TGIPaleo, A Girl Walks Into A Bar(Bell), Civilized Caveman Cooking.

Day 31:

Now what? This post does an excellent job outlining some of the challenges of finishing the Whole30. I have definitely had a lot of these thoughts; while I don't want to be Whole30 or Paleo forever, I will admit that I'm a little nervous about reintroducing stuff into my diet and losing all the (mainly mental) progress I have made. I love what they write about the tendency people have to get attached to a strict diet, and the importance of dealing with making your own choices, and living a healthy life. I think it's really important to trust yourself to make decisions, to not feel totally "all or nothing," or live in fear of "slipping." I also thought this post was great - if you find yourself having a nightmare about eating something "bad," it's time to reassess. I really appreciate that they address the fact that Whole30, as with any eating plan, can become unhealthy if taken to an extreme.

I will definitely continue eating protein packed breakfasts. I will continue to read labels, and throw back things that have lots of ingredients, and things I don't recognize. I will be mindful about seeing how my body responds to dairy, grains, and sugar. But, to be honest, I'm still not sure how Whole30 will change my eating habits in the long run - I'm certainly planning on eating donuts again at some point in my life! The creators of Whole30 suggest doing it a few times a year to "reset" and I really like that idea (OK, I'll admit it, I'm a crazy planner and already have a second round of Whole30 scheduled for July).

Anyways, I hope all this is helpful. If anyone has more questions, or comments about their experience with Whole30 I'd love to hear them!